Thursday, March 29, 2012

Sensus fidelium (the good sense of the faithful) rocks!

Yup, yours truly can still play the didgeridoo after the savage attack of that unreconstructed bigot Boru (see previous post). The teeth he broke were only dentures, and I've got a new upper set which fits better.

Now I've been reading a lot about King Bling, aka Benny Ratstinger, and it ain't pretty.

For instance, did you know that he wears Gucci shoes, a white dress, a load of kitschy tat bling, and looks more like a gangsta than a bishop. What is he like!

And he's an arrogant old git and listen to nobody apart from the usual traddy cronies, ponced up in their gladrags and funny red hats.

Well have I've got news for him!

Right on, Herr Benny!

Cos I've been reading up on catholic theology, and have some advice to give him, and all the other traddy bigots who make so much noise.

Vox populi vox Dei! In case your latin ain't up to scratch, that means "The voice of the people is the voice of God. It's in Latin cos it's a popish dogma, as if Benny R didn't know.

Sensus fidelium which means the common sense of the faithful. OK, benny, that's compassionate people like Tony Blair, Jon Cruddas, Greg Pope, Cardinal Campari, and those great folks at the Tablet. People not bound by your tired old dogmas, but following their consciences like what that Newman said they've got to.

So, then, if those loominaries in the "universal church", together with most of the normal folks in the UK think that LGBT marriage, is ok, then IT IS! Or are you gonna says they ain't faithful? Cos if you do, WATCH IT! I'm on to you!

And there's sex-ed, as taught in a lot of the better popish schools, liberated from prudery, resourced with hot sexy blue films, so kids can learn what to do and how. Everybody is OK with that, so that's ok.

The same goes for abortion. What compassionate person wants to return to the dark days of millions of back-street abortions every year, performed on the kitchen table with a pair of dirty scissors? Women dying in their thousands from nasty microbes? Is that compassion? If it is, you can stuff it, you talebanish so-called pro-lifers.

I thank whatever gods there be, that thanks to the compassionate actions of David Steal 45 years ago, fast, safe, caring abortions are as easy to come by as burger and chips.

No more blood poisoning!

No more poverty caused by too many kids.

Remember vox populi vox Dei, and and sensus fidelium. Bow your stiff neck, Ben, to the voice of THE PEOPLE!

So stick that in your thurible and puff it, old men of the vatican!

Monday, March 19, 2012

Bishop Smirk says - Why doesn't that boring Jhon Smeaton just shut up about gays and stick to rabbiting on about abortion?

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Those fine minds and deep thinkers at catholic voices really had it right over John Smeaton and SPUC. And all those people who attack him on Twitter. They know a thing or two.

SPUC's remit is to try to stop abortion, or so they used to say. 

So why the flaming hell are they sticking their oar in over same-sex marriage and that old-hat Pius XI. (here) Why are they attacking Archbishop Vincent Nichols, the great and good Greg Pope, and his fantastic Catholic Education Service, with its up-to-the-minute antihomophobic programmes?

It's nothing to do with abortion, and so (as they so very rightly keep pointing out on Twitter) it's none of Smeaton's or SPUC's business.

My guess is, and you can quote me all you like on this,  SPUC and Smeaton are anti same-sex marriage and anti-abortion cuz they're ANTI-FUN!


Friday, March 9, 2012

Guest Post from Sr Betsy Necrosis

Let me firstly thank Bishop Smirk for allowing me space on his wonderful blog, and secondly introduce myself.

I am Sister Betsy Necrosis and have taken public vows to Mother Gaia and Saint Margaret Sanger, to name only two. Inspired by Sister Whacko Dogsbreath to immerse myself in the Enneagram, I feel I am grounded, centred, open, questing, and very often hurting from the way my femininity is disparaged by Catholics, Muslims, and followers of the Great Thumb.

I have been driven to write this by a piece of nastiness on a blog calling itself the League of Torquemada, where a woman calling herself Sr Boudicca Nemesis has written a piece of uncaring, fascist, bigoted, stupid, totalitarian, mindless, prejudiced rubbish, which I think is an attempt to discredit me. That woman, just does not exist. Her name is too similar to mine for it to be a coincidence. It is an attempt to smear me with the brush of crypto-fascism and violent confrontation.

I suspect that behind this muck lies the evil far-from-genius Left-footer, who I have threatened with legal action.

So, just for the record, he is a totally unreconstructed male-chauvinist, sexist, agist, Latin-loving, inquisition-admiring, blinkered.... You name it, he's it.

And he thinks he is SO clever.

I am now overcome with emotion and will withdraw to my cell for some whirling, navel-contemplation, essential oils, and a tantric yoghurt.

More later.