Smirk Opines
Hooray for Clifford Longley, and his great and brave defence of that fine MP Jon Cruddas.
As Mr Longley very rightly said in that fine Catholic magazine, The Tablet,
"Would it not be reasonable for Catholic MPs to want to take into account the damage to respect for democracy and the rule of law that would follow if the criminalisation of all abortion had somehow been forced through Parliament in defiance of public opinion?"
Destroy Democracy for a blob of tissue that may have a cleft-palate, or flat feet or something? For a life (as the much-maligned Adolf Hitler remarked) that is not worth living?
Insane!
Mr Longley, the editor of the Tablet, John Cruddas,
I salute you.
Just keep 'em coming!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Monday, November 14, 2011
A Stupid Old Git called "Left-footer"
A Limerick by the Next Poet Laureate (Lil' Ol' Smirky)
A stupid old git called "Left-footer"
Thinks he's smart, but he's really a nutter.
Cracked under life's strain,
His hate-addled brain
Is where paranoid fantasies flutter.
A stupid old git called "Left-footer"
Thinks he's smart, but he's really a nutter.
Cracked under life's strain,
His hate-addled brain
Is where paranoid fantasies flutter.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Shrigots! All Kudos to John Cruddas MP and Francis Davis, a Circular Magician if there ever was one!
So Taleban Catholic bloggers - shrigots = shrill bigots (my own word, and I'm really proud of that one) are getting their knickers in a twist over the Dominicans inviting Mr John Cruddas MP to speak at their Oxford venue. As the Dominicans (or Dominican'ts tee! hee!) ran the Spanish Inquisition, responsible for the torture and murder of millions of Jews, Muslims, and Protestants, I guess he was doing them a great honour in accepting.
But no, a foreign Priest (H/T to Francis Davis here) called Father Pereira, supported by SPUC has thrown a spanner in the works. There will be no learned address from Mr Cruddas, who has done so much to support abortion and other liberal Catholic issues in Parliament.
The Dominicans couldn't do this great man (and a credit to his church) a honour if they tried!
By inviting this wise and compassionate man to give up his valuable time at the Mother of Parliaments to explain democracy to a bunch of obscurantist mystagogues, they are honouring only THEMSELVES.
SCUM!!!!!
I'm off now to read the rest of Francis Davis's blog and leave some complimentary comments.
But no, a foreign Priest (H/T to Francis Davis here) called Father Pereira, supported by SPUC has thrown a spanner in the works. There will be no learned address from Mr Cruddas, who has done so much to support abortion and other liberal Catholic issues in Parliament.
The Dominicans couldn't do this great man (and a credit to his church) a honour if they tried!
By inviting this wise and compassionate man to give up his valuable time at the Mother of Parliaments to explain democracy to a bunch of obscurantist mystagogues, they are honouring only THEMSELVES.
SCUM!!!!!
I'm off now to read the rest of Francis Davis's blog and leave some complimentary comments.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Bestial Pride!
What a great government we've got here in Britain! From now on I will always vote for the coalition!
First the last P.M., David Cameron announces plans to legalise gay marriage after March, and now, the new coalition Premier, Mr Napevno Gwoopy, not to be outdone, has promised what we've been waiting so long for.
Yes, all of us zoophiles can come out of the closet, or kennel, or rabbit-hutch, or hen-house now and rejoice, proudly, in our orientation, cuz within the year, promises Mr Gwoopy, inter-species marriage will be here.
My darling little aardvark Frisky was over the moon when I told him. The look of joy and gratitude in his eyes told me all I needed to know.
We can't wait to TIE THE KNOT! Now we must find him a wedding dress!
And yes, my friends in the Zoophile Information Exchange are planning the biggest street party ever seen on the streets of London on April 1st 2012.
BESTIALITY PRIDE!
Leading clergy, including open-minded R.C.s, have been invited, and so far over 100 have accepted.
Bishop Everly Mainchance has said, "Well, ok, I suppose it had to come, and I don't just accept, but rejoice at it, as a step forward for tolerance and the Big Society, which is what the church is all about, I think."
When asked how he thought the Pope would react, he answered, "Dunno. None of his biz..."
O GLAD! O Brave New World!
First the last P.M., David Cameron announces plans to legalise gay marriage after March, and now, the new coalition Premier, Mr Napevno Gwoopy, not to be outdone, has promised what we've been waiting so long for.
Yes, all of us zoophiles can come out of the closet, or kennel, or rabbit-hutch, or hen-house now and rejoice, proudly, in our orientation, cuz within the year, promises Mr Gwoopy, inter-species marriage will be here.
My darling little aardvark Frisky was over the moon when I told him. The look of joy and gratitude in his eyes told me all I needed to know.
We can't wait to TIE THE KNOT! Now we must find him a wedding dress!
And yes, my friends in the Zoophile Information Exchange are planning the biggest street party ever seen on the streets of London on April 1st 2012.
BESTIALITY PRIDE!
Leading clergy, including open-minded R.C.s, have been invited, and so far over 100 have accepted.
Bishop Everly Mainchance has said, "Well, ok, I suppose it had to come, and I don't just accept, but rejoice at it, as a step forward for tolerance and the Big Society, which is what the church is all about, I think."
When asked how he thought the Pope would react, he answered, "Dunno. None of his biz..."
O GLAD! O Brave New World!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Bishops Running Scared
Can you smell the stench of where-to-run-to, pant-wetting teeth-chattering fear, terror, dread, funk?
I can!
They're on the run! Who are? The sin-sodden, sex-hate-mongering, motherhood-and-apple-pie loving bishops in England and Wales, every pathetic mother's son of them.
And for why, you ask?
Cuz their time is up! It's high noon! It's the midnight hour, when Hell doth gape and all that.
Are you with me? No?
Well, try this for size. Our admirable boys in blue have been feeling a few christian collars oop North, and have warned a so-called christian coffee-shop owner to hide his stash of bibles.
And why?
Because, as Dr Krimpleane Phabbs has pointed out in these columns, THAT BOOK is a hate-filled sewer of homophobic poison, not fit for public display.
And the bishops (and it's their book after all) have said NOTHING! Not a word! Not a dickey-bird!
Not a word
I've heard!
Just shows us the buggers are scared!
Yup, I can write poetry, too.
I predict, no, prophesy, that in 5 years 5 YEARS!, the church of rome will be clattering around in circles like an empty beer can in a windy parking lot!
AND YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT.
Bogus Smirk, Chair, PAF (Proud and Faithless)
I can!
They're on the run! Who are? The sin-sodden, sex-hate-mongering, motherhood-and-apple-pie loving bishops in England and Wales, every pathetic mother's son of them.
And for why, you ask?
Cuz their time is up! It's high noon! It's the midnight hour, when Hell doth gape and all that.
Are you with me? No?
Well, try this for size. Our admirable boys in blue have been feeling a few christian collars oop North, and have warned a so-called christian coffee-shop owner to hide his stash of bibles.
And why?
Because, as Dr Krimpleane Phabbs has pointed out in these columns, THAT BOOK is a hate-filled sewer of homophobic poison, not fit for public display.
And the bishops (and it's their book after all) have said NOTHING! Not a word! Not a dickey-bird!
Not a word
I've heard!
Just shows us the buggers are scared!
Yup, I can write poetry, too.
I predict, no, prophesy, that in 5 years 5 YEARS!, the church of rome will be clattering around in circles like an empty beer can in a windy parking lot!
AND YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT.
Bogus Smirk, Chair, PAF (Proud and Faithless)
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Press Release by Dr Krimpleane Phabbs
Press Release Embargoed until 31.08.2011: 21.45
Internationally renowned and acclaimed microbiologist Dr Phabbs, chairperson of the Coalition for the Ending of Homophobia (CEH) has requested the extradition and trial of Mr Joseph Ratzinger (AKA Pope Benedict 16) on charges of disseminating homophobia and anti-gay hate-speech.
Said Dr Phabbs, "This man in his capacity of chairperson and chief executive of a religious cult, endorses the inerrancy of a book, the so-called "Bible", which is violently gay-unfriendly, and contains gloating descriptions of supernatural gay-bashing in a place identified as Sodom. He should be ashamed of himself.
"What is more, a character named as Lot is described as offering his daughters to the gays of Sodom, in a clear attempt to "convert" them to "straightness", an insult to their orientation. All because the local gays wanted to extend a welcome to Lot's male guest and be his buddy.
"In addition, Ratzinger has gone on record that his firm will not employ gays as ministers of religion.
"He must be made to face up to the appalling effects of this book, which is used as an official instruction manual and vade mecum in his organisation, and its malign influence on the Big Society. He endorses this scurrilous book which makes the Protocols of the Elders of Sion pale into insignificance.
"The author of this disgraceful and bigoted volume is said to be "the Almighty", and when we have tracked Him down, He too will be called to account.
If He cannot be tracked down, I will personally prove His non-existence."
Ends
Internationally renowned and acclaimed microbiologist Dr Phabbs, chairperson of the Coalition for the Ending of Homophobia (CEH) has requested the extradition and trial of Mr Joseph Ratzinger (AKA Pope Benedict 16) on charges of disseminating homophobia and anti-gay hate-speech.
Said Dr Phabbs, "This man in his capacity of chairperson and chief executive of a religious cult, endorses the inerrancy of a book, the so-called "Bible", which is violently gay-unfriendly, and contains gloating descriptions of supernatural gay-bashing in a place identified as Sodom. He should be ashamed of himself.
"What is more, a character named as Lot is described as offering his daughters to the gays of Sodom, in a clear attempt to "convert" them to "straightness", an insult to their orientation. All because the local gays wanted to extend a welcome to Lot's male guest and be his buddy.
"In addition, Ratzinger has gone on record that his firm will not employ gays as ministers of religion.
"He must be made to face up to the appalling effects of this book, which is used as an official instruction manual and vade mecum in his organisation, and its malign influence on the Big Society. He endorses this scurrilous book which makes the Protocols of the Elders of Sion pale into insignificance.
"The author of this disgraceful and bigoted volume is said to be "the Almighty", and when we have tracked Him down, He too will be called to account.
If He cannot be tracked down, I will personally prove His non-existence."
Ends
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Early Christians Not Bigots - Official
Guest Post by Professor Fatuus Twerp
A long-suppressed document, dating from the first century C.E., has emerged from the Vatican Library, casting a fascinating light on early Christian ecumenism. It was discovered by Justin de Groot, the pop singer, who has a D.Phil. in Comparative Superstition from Oxford University.
As translated by Professor Dino Nonevero, one extract, a report on the trial of some Christians accused of refusing to make public sacrifice to a Roman god, makes fascinating reading.
P.Cuius Agricola (Magistrate): You have a choice - sacrifice or die. How do you choose?
Christianus Oecumenicus (Christian): Where, lord, is the altar that we may sacrifice? For we are good Roman citizens and Caesar is our emperor. We are no closed sect, but on a journey, to learn and to grow in spirituality. We Christian Romans and non-Christian Romans have much to share, and Faith will speak unto Faith, so that all will be spiritually enriched. What is more..
Magistrate: By Hercules, get on with it. Sacrifice or die.
Christianus Oecumenicus: Lord, we will of course sacrifice whatever you shall require, for has not Saint Paul instilled in us obedience to magistrates? And will not our altar at Asissi proudly display a Buddha two thousand years hence, with the approval of the Supreme Pontiff, no less. Why, then, should we choose death rather than life, when we can with our lives serve great Caesar..
Magistrate: Immortal gods! Shut up you blathering dolt! Guards, take them away and see that they sacrifice.
Christianus: Bombulum*, bombulum, bombulum..
Magistrate: What are you saying, you saucy scoundrel?
Guard: It's only divine afflatus, my lord. C'mon you 'orrible lot.
This fragment, hidden for so long in the Vatican archives (and we can guess why) fully justifies the ecumenical outreaches of the Second Vatican Council, and will necessitate the rewriting of much church history.
*bombulum = a fart
A long-suppressed document, dating from the first century C.E., has emerged from the Vatican Library, casting a fascinating light on early Christian ecumenism. It was discovered by Justin de Groot, the pop singer, who has a D.Phil. in Comparative Superstition from Oxford University.
As translated by Professor Dino Nonevero, one extract, a report on the trial of some Christians accused of refusing to make public sacrifice to a Roman god, makes fascinating reading.
P.Cuius Agricola (Magistrate): You have a choice - sacrifice or die. How do you choose?
Christianus Oecumenicus (Christian): Where, lord, is the altar that we may sacrifice? For we are good Roman citizens and Caesar is our emperor. We are no closed sect, but on a journey, to learn and to grow in spirituality. We Christian Romans and non-Christian Romans have much to share, and Faith will speak unto Faith, so that all will be spiritually enriched. What is more..
Magistrate: By Hercules, get on with it. Sacrifice or die.
Christianus Oecumenicus: Lord, we will of course sacrifice whatever you shall require, for has not Saint Paul instilled in us obedience to magistrates? And will not our altar at Asissi proudly display a Buddha two thousand years hence, with the approval of the Supreme Pontiff, no less. Why, then, should we choose death rather than life, when we can with our lives serve great Caesar..
Magistrate: Immortal gods! Shut up you blathering dolt! Guards, take them away and see that they sacrifice.
Christianus: Bombulum*, bombulum, bombulum..
Magistrate: What are you saying, you saucy scoundrel?
Guard: It's only divine afflatus, my lord. C'mon you 'orrible lot.
This fragment, hidden for so long in the Vatican archives (and we can guess why) fully justifies the ecumenical outreaches of the Second Vatican Council, and will necessitate the rewriting of much church history.
*bombulum = a fart
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